This is part two of a four-part story. Part one is here.
The New Age
Around age 29, I was drawn to witchcraft, but hearing that “spells” don’t work unless you do the work put me off. I lost interest. Unfortunately, I went to New Age instead.
New Age was appealing to me. I wanted to speak things into existence with manifestation. I looked into the dangerous practice of opening “the third eye”. I got divination cards to see the future. I bought crystals to attract love, money and success. I chanted mantras, meditated, lit candles and placed them near mirrors to communicate with dead ancestors.
I will never forget a particular meditation I did. It was about the New Age practice of connecting with your “spirit guide”. During the meditation, I ended up seeing this so-called guide. It was a silhouette of a tall man. I couldn’t see his face or features, but his presence felt comforting. Now I believe that was an evil entity trying to connect with me. He emitted a kind, comforting aura, but he didn’t have good intentions. God is light. That entity was pitch black.
On My Way Home
At age 30, I wanted to connect with angels. I got a book about them and did a quiz to discover my “guardian angel”, but I didn’t realise that guardian angels aren’t Biblical. I was matched with Archangel Michael, which was very disappointing! Why? Because I didn’t want him, I wanted the angel Sariel instead.
Let me be clear: Sariel isn’t mentioned in the Bible. We hear about Michael, Gabriel, Abaddon, the Angel of the Lord, and Satan/Lucifer. But at this time, I didn’t know that.
I went online and looked up angel names and found myself drawn to Sariel. Then I listened to one of my favourite composers, and by chance his song was called Sariel. I took that as a sign. Sariel was communicating with me! He was my guardian angel.
When I lit candles and sat before a mirror, I felt connected to Sariel and my dead ancestors. I used pretty crystals and meditation, too. Eventually another name came to me: Sophie. I thought it was another spirit guide, so I wasn’t concerned at all. Now I’m disturbed by it and wonder who, if anyone, I was “connected” to. Fortunately, after feeling letdown by Sariel and Sophie, I “cut ties” with them and realised that they might not really be there.
But I still didn’t seek God.
My conversion story will continue in part three.